My Oldest Graduated 5th Grade
I thought I would cry.
If you know me, that probably wouldn’t surprise you. I’m sentimental. I hold onto things. I feel the weight of moments as they’re happening. I’ve cried watching strangers run marathons!
So when my oldest son graduated from 5th grade, I expected the tears to come….But they didn’t.
Maybe it was sitting outside on the blacktop on the first hot and humid day. Perhaps the beads of sweat masked the tears as they formed near my temples.
Maybe it was the mic that unfortunately kept going in and out so I couldn’t really feel the impact of each word.
Maybe it was the fact that I have been mentally preparing for this since I first witnessed the 5th grade clap out and burst into spontaneous tears (not even knowing any of the graduating 5th graders).
Maybe it is just that week of the month when my emotions take a back seat for a bit.
I can’t stop thinking about why it didn’t feel like a punch to my gut though. I mean this was just yesterday, right?
It wasn’t that the moment didn’t matter, of course it did. It felt significant in all the ways you’d expect. Another chapter closing and the shift into a new stage of childhood.
But instead of feeling overwhelmed by how fast it all went, I felt… steady. (for once!) Perhaps because I’ve been saying goodbye in small ways all along.
Each school year.
Each birthday.
Each version of who he was becoming.
Not in a heavy or emotional way, but in a noticing way.
Paying attention.
Taking it in and taking the photos.
Letting it matter while it was happening, not just once it was over.
I’ve realized that when you do that, when you stay present inside the season you’re in and capture it or soak it in the best you can, the big milestones don’t hit you all at once.
They just land a little softer.
And it made me think about what we hold onto as parents.
The photos we take.
The moments we document.
The reasons we choose to remember certain seasons.
It’s easy to feel like we need to capture everything before it slips away. But I don’t think it’s just trying to freeze a moment.
I think it’s about keeping up with it. Being in the moment as much as possible.
Letting yourself see it clearly for what it is, as it’s happening.
Letting yourself feel it in real time.
So that when you reach a moment like this one, you don’t feel like you missed everything that led up to it. You feel like you were there for all of it.
That’s what I hope to give the families I photograph.
Not just images to look back on, but a way to stay connected to the season you’re in while you’re still in it.
Because maybe the goal isn’t to stop time from moving so fast, maybe it’s just to linger in it, notice and move along with it.
